Example of Intrinsic Acceptance
We are intrinsically imperfect…
“Eric, do you think you are doing the right thing?”
“Eric, look at other kids, look at how kids behave at other family, why are you behaving like this?”
I received this daily from my mom even until 20 year old.
Whenever I am doing something different from my parent’s expectation they will try to correct me.
Correct me in an attitude that if i dont do as they told me, i will get punished.
And most people dont like to get punished except being slapped ass.
Therefore, the attitude that we want to avoid making mistake is not for improvement but to avoid being punished or scolded.
And the more we avoid being punished, the more we are afraid of making mistake, to a degree that once we make a mistake, others will want us to die.
Ultimately, system conditioned us that even making a tiny mistake is utterly unacceptable.
The problem is people’s negative attitude and emotion while telling others they are doing wrong. Imagine we are living in world where a lot of our parent, colleague, classmate, teacher constantly say to us “oh come on , how come you made a mistake again ” or “ WTF you should do this, instead of this” when making mistake.
It’s easy that we will feel like we are living wrongly.
Fortunately, i have four little stories that make me understand that we are born with radical acceptance.
@1: I was traveling in southern India, I walked into a primary school without fancy clothe, with small tired eye and smelly clothe. I was nervous if i will get kicked out or not, I was self-doubting if I look welcoming enough.
But once i walk inside the school.
BOOM!
Many kids are not only looking at me but smiling. They approach me. They interact with me. They wave at me. They try to talk to me even though they dont speak good English.
They let me know I am welcomed here even though my appearance suck.
@2 I have been on my hitchhike mission for 8months, I would like to bring my grandma with me but she doesn't want to. What she want is simply to talk to me in person, to hug me.
AHh she also want me to earn money in Taiwan(my hometown) not to be a person who work for no salary abroad.(dedicated working on medium and youtube so far but no income)
But when I ask her
“Grandma, what if i dont like the traditional work, what if im not interested in earning too much money and only have a little salary, how will you react?”
“Will you still love me? will you feel sad because i have low salary?”
“Eric, why the hell I would feel sad and stop loving you just because you have a low salary, no matter what happen, you are always my grandson, I only want you to be humble,kind, and let me see you in person, that's all, when will you come back to Taiwan?”
Write until this point, i realized so many people including my family housekeeper and my hitchhike driver who is poor has no choice but to work abroad and separate themselves from their kids.
We are living at the cost of their sadness.
And i dont want this to happen
Anyways the point of this story is that my grandma will still love me even though I have low salary.
@3 I was hitchhiking from a small village to Krasnoyarsk(Siberia), I waited for 8 hours but still no car stopped. I was really sad and nervous even though I already have more than 70 hitchhike experiences.
Because the fact that hundreds of drivers didnt stop their car make me feel like i am doing something wrong.
But
Do you believe in miracle?
3 cars suddenly stopped in front of me, yes !! 3 cars!! one ask me where do you wanna go, let me hitchhike you, one ask me if I want to eat her pie and drink her juice, last one ask if i wanna sleep at their house.
These 3 cars of people let me understand that i wasn't doing anything wrong, they tell me hitchhike right now is hard not because I look like a bad guy, not because I dress wrongly or behave wrongly but simply because is covid19 period.
@4 I was standing on the street
For 10 minutes?
No, for 2 hours.
What the hell am i doing there right?
I greet people by saying “goodmorning” and “may i ask you a question”, I want to increase human connection, i want to care about people, i want to learn from stranger.
But most people would ignore me despite my strong positive emotion spending on people.
I feel like i was doing something utterly incorrect again.
Until this guy appear.
“HOlly shit, Eric, wtf are you doing here, why are you still standing here while so many people ignore you? dont you feel frustrated when people ignore you constantly, especially you are sharing your positive energy for such along time?”
I was speechless when he said this
I hugged him, genuine hug, not the kind of hug halfly.
“Eric, you should reduce your self doubt a little bit, because i really think it’s a good method to improve humanity by talking to people on the street, not for the sake of asking road but for the sake of making friend”
I felt gratitude Goosebumps
“You make me so happy simply by having conversation with me, I’m really lucky to meet you, you let me know I am at a right direction”
202011 Eric(Naruto) Odessa
